god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
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