How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
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