Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
