just come out here and I will go home with you...
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
You've changed since you got that strap on
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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