It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Don't tell me you're on acid again
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Randomize
