is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I need to sanitize my soul.
Randomize
