I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
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