We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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