Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize