Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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