he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize