all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
Randomize