I hate all girls vehemently.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
