The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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