also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
This house was built for laser tag.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
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