Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
