11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize