I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize