I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Randomize
