Texts From Last Night

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  (706): View more from Georgia

  If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore

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  (706): If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore http://tfl.nu/b6gx
  Replies (14) Good night (3769) Bad night (801)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted

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  (703): so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted http://tfl.nu/4p9h
  Replies (20) Good night (896) Bad night (2682)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."

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  (612): the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear." http://tfl.nu/uaxy
  Replies (19) Good night (9330) Bad night (972)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.

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  (248): If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes. http://tfl.nu/zk30
  Replies (1) Good night (2301) Bad night (1014)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.

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  (860): We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun. http://tfl.nu/8k8b
  Replies (20) Good night (2092) Bad night (2714)
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit

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  (901): He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit http://tfl.nu/0txt
  Replies (8) Good night (889) Bad night (2477)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?

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  (613): Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots? http://tfl.nu/j4og
  Replies (6) Good night (2793) Bad night (900)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone

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  (206): In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone http://tfl.nu/jkow
  Replies (5) Good night (1868) Bad night (1440)
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  (253): View more from Washington

  I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks

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  (253): I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks http://tfl.nu/tvej
  Replies (11) Good night (1106) Bad night (595)
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  (516): View more from New York

  He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him

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  (516): He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him http://tfl.nu/fil7
  Replies (10) Good night (996) Bad night (545)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.

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  (519): I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar. http://tfl.nu/vv54
  Replies (2) Good night (1192) Bad night (515)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.

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  (412): Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling. http://tfl.nu/npes
  Replies (11) Good night (961) Bad night (365)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER

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  (215): And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER http://tfl.nu/p5xk
  Replies (2) Good night (914) Bad night (218)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.

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  (413): Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him. http://tfl.nu/18mb
  Replies (1) Good night (979) Bad night (229)
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  (802): View more from Vermont

  My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand

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  (802): My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand http://tfl.nu/akgx
  Replies (1) Good night (372) Bad night (200)

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