Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(989): View more from Michigan

if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK

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(732): View more from New Jersey

I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at

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(310): View more from California

do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?

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(928): View more from Arizona

whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?

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If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things
Read it at the TFLN blog
(919): View more from North Carolina

so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?

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(540): View more from Virginia

I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this

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(914): View more from New York

How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.

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(701): View more from North Dakota

Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.

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