You made me cry and you don't even care
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
that is very illegal...i love you.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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