Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Randomize
