I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
I cockslap morals
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
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