check it out our google latitudes are spooning
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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