Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
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