ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize
