can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
