If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Randomize
