white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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