she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize