she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
The air was thick with penises
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
