Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
