Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
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