I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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