For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
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