Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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