I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize