I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize
