Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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