she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
