So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
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