So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
