uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
