his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
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