He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize