You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
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