you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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