I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
