my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
