So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
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did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
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I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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